The Unexpected Answer to Deal With The Uncertainty, Doubts, And Fears of Pursuing A Dream

Earlier this week I asked all of the readers here: What is your biggest frustration in the pursuit of your dream?

The answers blew my mind. The most common responses dealt with uncertainty, fear and doubts. Below is what I believe is the key to pushing past our uncertainty, doubts, and fears. I hope you find it helpful.

 

Click here to check out the recent “Ask The Readers Post”. The comments were freaking awesome! – If you leave a comment I will reply :) .

Video Outline

0:30- The most common frustration of readers in the pursuit of their dreams. 0:47 – My answer to deal with the most common frustrations of pursuing a dream. 1:59 – The Strategies I use to increase my positive feelings about myself. 2:17 – Strategy #1 explained 2:56- Strategy # 2 explained 3:36- Strategy #3 explained

To get the most out of the video above do the following: 

1. Watch the Video 2 times. 2. The First time just listen to it. Pay attention to see what resonates. 3. The second time pull out a paper, pencil and write down any key points that can help you. 4. Choose one thing from the video and take action!

 

3 Thoughts on Dealing With Uncertainty, Doubt, and Fear

If you do nothing, you’ll become nothing. Is that the certainty you want? [Click to tweet]

Success is the day to day progress towards your goals. [Click to tweet]

You hangout with yourself 24 hours a day 7 days a week. It’s easier if you like yourself. [Click to tweet]

 

 For the comments: 

What do you think is the best way to deal with the uncertainty, doubts and fears of pursuing a dream? (Please don’t hold anything back! This is your opportunity to help others with some great tips!)

If you enjoyed this post the best way to express it is by doing one of the following 3 things:

1. Leave a comment. 2. Like it with the Facebook button. 3. Share it on Twitter.

 

 For the comments: 

What do you think is the best way to deal with the uncertainty, doubts and fears of pursuing a dream? (Please don’t hold anything back! This is your opportunity to help others with some great tips!)

  • Hanneke

    LIKE YOURSELF!! :D D

    Thank you Izzy… spot-on great advice! I wrote it on a post-it of it and stuck it on my laptop so I’ll be reminded of it often!

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      Hi Hanneke :) . It kind of cracks me up because it’s kind of funny advice but it is super true :) . It’s something I have only recently hit upon. I realized something that allows me to move forward is the fact that I like myself – which allows me to forgive myself when I screw up and make mistakes. Pretty important.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment. I really appreciate it.

  • http://www.vishnusvirtues.com/ Vishnu

    Izzy – you’re too humble!! you are a super model in all regards. haha I love the Rocky Balboa look in this video – you look like you’re about to go knock down a punching bags a few hundred times or go for a 15 mile run after.

    Liking ourselves and having positive feelings towards ourselves is key to pursuing our dreams and everything else in our lives. In addition to the 3 strategies you mention, how about improving this negative self-talk that buzzes around in our head so much of the time? Trying to replace that with positive self talk is also key to liking ourselves and confidence!

    Oh yeah, I’m back! lol

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      What is up Vishnu! I never thought I would admit it but I kind of missed you. Okay, fine! I’ll admit it – Yes! I totally missed your always sarcastic yet (somehow) at the same time very insightful comments :) .

      You nail it man! Positive self talk is insanely important. What blows my mind is not just the fact that so many people are there own worst enemies but even worse they don’t know it! Some people even wear their negative self talk like it’s a badge. They claim to be “a perfectionist” or to have “high expectations”. I’m all for “high expectations” but not when we use it as a copout so we don’t have to take a risk!

      Glad to have you back man. Let’s skype soon (I’m thinking late this month)! I’m looking forward to reading your “1 million lessons learned from running an election campaign” blog post. It’s bound to go viral (at a minimum!).

  • Lisa

    Izzy, I am starting to really look forward to your videos. It’s like chatting with an encouraging bud. Thank you for all you do.

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      Lisa thank you so much for taking the time to say this :) . I’m so glad that you feel encouraged by it! I hope you go out today and kick some serious butt!

  • Sean

    Love these videos Izzy. It’s interesting that, for me, one of the smaller points stuck out the most – arrogance. it’s a fine line between having the confidence to like oneself and becoming arrogant. Perhaps it’s because I’ve fallen into that trap at work lately. This video was a great reminder that as we like ourself and build confidence in our skill sets, it’s important to remain humble and helpful to others. Thanks man.

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      Sean I think it is beautiful that you are catching yourself in this process. My guess is that you are further from arrogance than you think – because true arrogance refuses to acknowledge it is humanly possible that they are arrogant. Your comment sounds like your quite a humble dude!

      You know it is an interesting thought you bring up. I wonder if arrogance and genuinely liking ourselves are close in nature.

      I almost feel like they are coming from complete opposite directions. I feel like arrogance has a constant need to prove to ourselves and everyone else around us that “we are worthy” while when we like ourselves we step back and just enjoy what we can bring to the table. In a sense arrogance is a consequence of not liking ourselves enough so we try to prove to the world and ourselves that we are worthy.

      As I like myself more and more I don’t feel a pressure to prove to everyone else that I am awesome – so it allows me to step back and appreciate myself and others more. I become calmer and more at ease in all situations.

      Does this make sense? Am i jibber jabbing some crazy talk :) ?

      I’d be interested in your thoughts on the issue :) .

      • Sean

        Interesting ideas here Izzy.

        I’ve always looked at arrogance as a consequence of confidence having turned into pride. That need to prove oneself when someone challenges us in an area we already had confidence in (e.g. knowledge or a skill set). Now that I think about it… that’s a beautiful thing because it shows that there’s always someone, or something, out there that can challenge us to become better (even if they don’t realize they’re doing it). As long as we’re humble enough to see those challenges as opportunities.

        Your approach makes a lot more sense. I think it’s definitely true that the pressure fades away as we begin to like ourselves and become comfortable with what we bring to the table. I’m going to have to think about that some more.

        Cheers.

        • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

          Fascinating stuff Sean :) . I guess really at the core of it all – is that what matters is that we find a way to humbly appreciate ourselves. In my experience the more I am able to humbly appreciate my own skill set the more I am able to genuinely appreciate the strengths that others bring to the table (because I don’t feel threatened when I humbly appreciate myself).

          Thanks for taking the time to respond and for adding so much to the conversation – I guarantee some people will read these comments and be fascinated by it!

  • Erik

    I am looking forward to these videos and blog posts.

    After watching the video, it made me think about how we can be our own best friend or our worst critic.

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      Yo Erik!

      Yeah man, it is so true! I was listening to an audio by Bryan Tracy yesterday and he mentioned how on average 95% of our emotions at any given time are based on the dialogue we have with ourselves. At first I found it hard to believe, and actually still kind of do that the number is that high. But even if our own dialogues impact 70% of our emotions that is crazy!

      It means that if we positively interact with ourselves it can completely revolutionize our life. Pretty wild stuff!

      P.S – Thanks for the kind words about “looking forward to the videos and blog posts” – it’s nice to hear that :) .

  • Tomo

    Hi Izzy.

    Really like your vids and blog posts.

    Love your funny and crazy style dude.

    If the outcome from not liking or loving yourself is not being able to like or love someone else, isn´t that being arrogant. It´s probably easier to like or love anything else, ( another person or what you are up to ), if you are able to like/love yourself. I think: more than the half job is already done …or maybe 70 percent.

    Starting loving ourselves is being honest to ourselves and it is not being selfish. Know what? It is the best thing to do.

    Taking care of your body by exercising,eating healthy, getting adequate sleep and having fun is a good start of liking yourself.

    As long as you don´t hurt or harm anyone I can see only positive outcomes. Having a big heart, being kind and have a great sense of humor ( like you Iz ), will get anyone on the track.

    Peace ´n Love

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      Tomo I straight up love it!

      I read something recently (can’t remember where) that said we are incapable of loving anyone else more than we love ourself. Not sure if this is 100 percent true but at least to some degree it is :) .

      I know for me, in my past when I was younger and felt insecure I spent so much time thinking about myself that I was unable to appreciate the beauty that others brought to the table. But as I have become more comfortable with who I am it allows me to be fully present when I interact with people – and consequentially I notice their beauty.

      I love how you mention that we loving ourselves starts with being honest with ourself! So darn true. But sometimes the truth is scary because we have to admit where we are struggling and the changes we have to make.

      Thank you so much for taking the time to comment Tomo :) – And of course, I love the kind words (Putting a big smile on my face!).

  • http://twitter.com/ryzeonline Jason Fonceca

    Hahah, I agree with Tomo, the funny, crazy cartoons rock it – and its great to see video presence as well :) It’s funny, I’ve been writing a lot about fears lately, because I’ve pretty much been living the fears of every entrepreneur… all at once:) Thanks for uplifting and inspiring, man.

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      It’s the “law of attraction” at work my man. We are drawn to those things that we constantly think about. It’s some pretty incredible stuff.

      When we go through tough times we can only have one of two responses: either it makes us stronger or weaker. There is no going back to who we were before it happened – it’s done, part of the past. Keep on pushing my man.

      I’m stoked you dig the cartoons.

      Thanks for take the time to comment Jason.

  • GettingOIdNow

    Izzy, I’ll bet I’m the only older person responding to your site and your video! I’m young at heart – a flower child from the 60′s. Your video meant a lot to me because I know intellectually that I need to do these things, but it’s hard when you are hurting from not being happy. Also, Izzy, the rules are different when you are near or at the end of your career years, instead of beginning. You have less options because you have less time to make all the changes in direction you want to.
    Like yourself, I taught (biology) and also DID FINISH my masters (when I was 50!). But after a while, I wasn’t smiling when I got to school teaching those 7th-graders. I think when you teach you have to be in it with both feet, and I knew I had to leave. I had a melt down similar to yours, as I felt guilty for leaving teaching.

    Some years later, I’m working as a program manager – driving into the city each day, and getting really tired. I want to quit! I have a dependent son who is not taking on his share of the load, and this makes me feel like I have to work forever. What I want to do is this: I want to live on a really tight budget, get rid of all the crap, and downsize – and want to get my son functioning happily and making it (he needs to see your video!). This is what I know will make me happy. It’s the fear and uncertainty that keeps me from working – that I won’t have enough money, won’t have enough to help my son finish school, etc. Help!

    Keep up this great site and write some books!

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      Hello Getting Old Now :) .

      Thank you for taking the time to write such a genuine and honest comment.

      I have to throw this out there – The fact that you have “less time” with your career doesn’t seem to change anything to me. Maybe I’m crazy – but in 2 years both you and I will be 2 years older :) .

      Yes, I understand from “society’s” viewpoint it is different – but screw what society thinks! They are wrong most of the time anyways! As far as I’m concerned the principles remain exactly the same. 1) identify what you want to do 2) figure out how to do it 3) Take action 4) Adjust and modify as you progress.

      Am I talking crazy talk here?

      You know exactly what you want. You said it within the body of that comment. That is wonderful! Now, it is simply a question of “How?” Don’t worry about barriers just ask yourself “How?” Write down the steps and take your first step as soon as you finish writing down the “How?” If it is scary – then welcome to the pursuit of a dream. It’s always scary! That is what makes beautiful as well.

      But I will say this although the pursuit of a dream is scary – what scares me to death is the idea that I could live my life without trying to pursue my dream. Now that is some SCARY STUFF!

  • GettingOIdNow

    Izzy,
    The other thing I think is important – now responding to your query – is that you choose the path “with heart.” You need to have the courage to take the risk to do what you know in your heart is the best for you, for your community, your family, the world. Sometimes I think if you throw this “out to the universe,” you can find a way to your path. This is also what I need to be doing now – sometimes this choice doesn’t seem like the one that brings you the most money, but I think if you believe in yourself (and like yourself) you can make it.

    Another reason your post and videos are important is that the world and especially young people need a role model like yourself. You can change the world for the better, Izzy!

    • http://www.30yearoldninja.com/ Izmael Arkin

      What a wonderful comment! I love this line: “You need to have the courage to take the risk to do what you know in your heart is the best for you”

      Very powerful!

      In regards to money – I believe that if we chase money it is a waste of our time! We’ll end up stressed, depressed, burnt out and unhappy. But if we chase our passion and commit to helping others than money will come as a natural side effect. Just my thoughts :) .

      P.S – Also, thank you for your incredibly kind words. It always feels nice when people say nice things :) .